We Don't Move On from Grief, We Move Forward With It

At May’s (2019) meeting Adam Biggs presented, We Don’t “Move On” from Grief. We Move Forward With It from Nora McInerny.

In 2014 on October 3, Nora lost her 2nd pregnancy. In the same month on October 8, she lost her father to cancer and on November 25 of the same year her husband, Aaron, died with brain cancer. She explains grief is one of those things you don’t “get it” until it happens to you. People around us are so uncomfortable with grief. For this reason she is a strong advocate of small support groups where we can talk about our deceased love one. The people in support groups “get it.” We don’t only understand each other; we need each other to help us move forward with our grief. Grief is not a moment in time, it is permanent. Some things can’t be fixed and not all wounds are meant to heal.

I have had people tell me I need closure. There is no such thing as closure when you lose your child. This podcast really resonated with me for this reason. I will never “move on” from the loss of Terri, yet I can move forward with it. Memories stay with us. Terri will always be a part of my life.

Nora said a grieving person will be sad and happy – you will be grieving and able to love in the same year, or week, or same breath. Her closing statement, “A grieving person is going to laugh again and smile again. Yes, absolutely they are going to move forward, but that doesn’t mean they have moved on.”

To listen to the TED Talk, click here:

https://ed.ted.com/featured/Zkzjst9e

Janice Steele

Moving Forward Together